Two weekends ago I was privileged to stand up in my dear sister-in-laws wedding. My husband was also a groomsman, so I was lucky to walk down the isle again with my best friend. When the doors opened and I saw the overjoyed expression on both the bride and the groom, I couldn't help but reflect on the eight years of marriage that makes my husband and I the couple we are today (but I can elaborate on that some other time). What I was really able to appreciate were the words of the pastor during the ceremony about "love".
Nearly every wedding I have been to "love" is the main topic of the sermon....and it should be, it is absolutely necessary for a lasting marriage. We can read about the different kinds of love in the Bible, but that afternoon the pastor elaborated on the fact that love is a choice that both spouses need to choose for the rest of their lives together. I truly believe this concept is not fully understood until a couple is actually married, because after the newly-wedded bliss wears off (and it will) and the difficult trials in life happen (and they will...a lot!), will this concept of "choosing to love" need to be implemented.
The pastor also talked about happiness in a marriage and how it is really only accomplished when both people are, in fact, happy...sounds so obvious and simple, right? I have learned that the things in life that make me happy and enriched can be COMPLETELY different than the things that make my husband happy. Since there can be such a difference in what makes individuals happy, the other person is required to often times put the other spouses needs above their own in order to create happiness for that person. This idea is so simple but not very easy (in fact, it can be incredibly hard), especially during the stressful and difficult times in life. Creating happiness for the other person is daily "work", which may be easy for some couples and very challenging for others, but is absolutely necessary for a lasting marriage.
I believe in marriage, hands down, what BOTH spouses put in, is what they will get in return... a marriage that is enriched by the difficult times because each person made an active decision to continue to love one another and in return a life of happiness.
I would like to encourage all you married people out there (including myself) to listen to your spouse and find out their "love language" and really try to show them the kind of love the way they need it.
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